GULP...

I look at my left hand often. I admire my rings, not just because they blind people, but because of what they represent. "Crazy Love" that is what the inside of my wedding band says and that is us. We are one unit, one team, one family...togetherness. So why then, has it been so hard for me to take his last name? Why do we have this ritual? Why would I change my identity just because of these rings and vows? I will still honor and cherish him all the days of my life even if my last name is not the same as his. Carbonaro is Italian but what is Truscott? My name doesn't flow as Stefanie Nicole Truscott like it does as Stefanie Nicole Carbonaro and that could partially be my bias as well! I really have always been very proud to be 100% Italian. How many other people in our melting pot can says they are 100% anything?!?

We had been married for a few weeks and I had been thinking about how people wouldn't know I was Italian with the last name Truscott. I was at the gym taking a spin class from my friend Courtenay. The class was a mix of men and women and after class chatted with Court for a few minuets and left. The next day she said to me that one of the guys in there said  that I must have been Italian. I laughed when she told me and thought he just looked at me and knew that!?!? He didn't need to know my last name! People would still figure out I was Italian but seeing a different last name was still too weird for me. I just kept thinking that isn't ME! I don't know that name I don't know who that person is... I know who Stefanie Carbonaro is. As time has passed, I feel like I have my alter ego Stefanie Truscott. Who do I want to be today?

I have talked with multiple people about this matter. Many say you don't have to change it if you don't want to, while others, explain the family dynamic feel... one unit under the same name. I have felt this constant nagging inside me because of our upcoming trip to Vegas. I guess Nic had said I was changing my name and when plane tickets were bought they had my alter ego's name on them. At first I thought no big deal, I'll adjust to all of this by the time February comes and this name change business won't be a big deal. Heck, most of my friends thought it was the greatest thing to change this last name to their husbands. Clearly that is not me! I honestly think if I didn't have a plane ticket in my alter ego's name I wouldn't have changed my name until children came into the picture. I can't wrap my head around having a different last name than my children. And that is where the one unit one family aspect comes into play. I want that! I don't want my kids to ask why mommy has a different name than them or have someone not think they are MY kids because of our last names.

Therefore, I did it. Last week, I went to social security and officially became my alter ego, Stefanie Nicole Truscott! On Friday, I enjoyed my two hour stint at the DMV. I totally forgot to practice signing my new name but the guy assured me he had lots of paper to practice if I needed to! New bank cards are in my wallet and all that is left is my passport. Can I just say this whole new name process is a giant pain in the ass! I think the guy should have to go through some of the pain I endured in the many wasted hours if it be on the phone or in person with all these people who need my new name, license number, etc.

Here's the proof!

yes, blurry on purpose... no need to know my height, weight, sex, eye color, etc!