If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it. ~Mary Engelbreit
Recently, I have realized I am no longer in that in between stage. I have made it to the women's section. You know when you were younger and you started in the "girls" section and then you were forced into the "juniors." I did not want to go to the "juniors" section! Well, I developed a little faster than the rest and had to go to the "juniors" clothes first. Yes, before all my friends did and that was a tragedy! Then, I was very content in juniors and it wasn't that the sizes didn't fit any longer but rather the bright pinks and "little kid" style didn't mesh with me any longer! When I bought my first pair of jeans in POV, point of view for all you non nordy folks, I kinda cringed. But they fit and looked good and they said size 2, so I HAD to buy them! DUH!
No, this is not about changes in my body. However, it is a little weird when things don't fit the way they used to. I'm only 26! What happens at 46? Oh don't tell me!!! Anyway, it is about a switch in my brain that turned on. I used to be the Western Washington College student. Now, those students drive me bonkers! They have taken over Fred Meyer, attend and host LOUD parties at all hours of the night, act like their shit doesn't stink....news flash it reaks...etc. I have realized that I do NOT like living in a college town! I can't change the fact that this is a college town but I can move or change my thinking on it. I do not have a problem in the summer with changing my thinking on them or this city. Because, in the summer most of the student are gone and I love what Bellingham becomes! However, the rest of the year I could do without the town being clogged up! Ch ch ch changes... maybe a move? But I love my new job, so I guess I better learn to think differently about it!
I also need to think about something else differently. Sometimes I don't give myself enough credit. At times, I feel like I sell myself short. I graduated from high school with a 3.8 gpa and 85 college credits. I worked hard to achieve my bachelors degree. I spent a grueling year with crazy girls to receive my cosmetology license and I feel rather silly saying I was valedictorian...but I was! But right there, is where I don't give myself enough credit. Beauty school valedictorian sounds funny, but it was hard work that I need to be proud of. Why do I let what society had deemed hair stylists to be or lack as a reason to not feel good about my accomplishments? I think about Western and how I went there to be a Bio major and came out Comm. Why, because I didn't think I could pass the Chem series that Bio majors had to take. Did I sell myself short? Should I have tried harder? I still wish I had done Bio and not Comm but we cannot change what is already done. Then most recently, I went for dental assisting and not hygiene. Why? Because it as a shorter program! Did I sell myself short because I didn't want to spend another two years in school for another degree? I feel like hygienists are looked at more highly than assistants but is that just me needing to change my own mindset?
I was assisting with a composite filling yesterday and the patient wanted to be on nitrous. Of course I am like a little kid that must know everything, and I started asking the Dr. about the gas. We began talking molecules and how their characteristics affect the way the gauge on the tank goes down. When you read the oxygen tank, the arrow gradually goes down and then at zero you know it is empty. The nitrogen arrow goes from full and then empty and nothing in between. I LOVE this kind of stuff. I LOVE science! The Dr. looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want to become a dentist?" And for a split second I thought about it. This is where my thinking change happened. I know I could do it. I could be a dentist and get through all the schooling and even come out on top. However, I do not want to start my own business. I do not want to deal with growing client/patients, been there done that with hair! I do not want to worry about law suits! Although I know I could be a dentist, I do not want to journey down that path. I decided I am not selling myself short but rather choosing the jobs and education that I find pride in. Where my best is highlighted and I enjoy what I do! I need to remember it isn't about climbing the ladder to VP CEO or what have you... for me it is about loving what I do and being the best at it!
until next time...
