I've had a journal since I was 16 years old. I went in spurts as to how often I would write in it. I've had four different journals. I always changed them when something major happened. I started my first journal after our house burnt down. It let me get my fears out without having to talk to anyone about it. I didn't sleep well for a while and would wake up in the middle of the night and write it all down so I could get back to sleep. I guess that is to be expected though when you live in a hotel room for 3 weeks. Two more journals on boyfriends and the last one was about me. Finding out who I was, growing, my life's journey as I saw it. I wrote about my happiness and sorrows, adventures and failures, the good and bad things I realized about who I was and how to improve, and much more. My only concern about my journal was that someone aka my brother would find it and know all my secrets and tease me about them.
Now I write this blog. I started it because I wanted to be an open book and how I want my life to be told. I am realizing tonight that maybe jotting my life on pieces of paper and hiding it away would be easier! Of course hiding is easier than putting it all out there. I am open and honest and raw. I now realize that some of what I write isn't as open as others want me to be. So, do I make this blog private to only those I wish to share it with? Does that make the point of my blog, being an open book, irrelevant then? Do I only talk about me, myself, and I and not mention others names? Do I make it just my own thoughts and walk and nothing about those that I include in my life? How do I write about MY life and daily adventures with others and not include them in my posts? How do I keep the lives of others private from those of you reading about me? Is that possible on a blog? HELP!
until next time...
Oh man, do I ever know what you're talking about. One of my old roommates and great friend, Ryan Olson, is in town from South Korea where he is currently teaching English. Kara and I had him over for dinner last night so he could catch up with my family, and of course, meet Ava. As the night carried on and we got past all the stories since we have last seen each other we found ourselves in an old, yet familiar situation. We carried on the remainder of our evening just simply discussing life without holding back any details, without passing judgment, and most importantly we listened with an open ear. During our time together in Bellingham these talks were quite frequent and while politically we agree to disagree, we process and share information in a similar style. To bounce theories, ideas, values, and our general outlook on life off each other was an outstanding way to keep each other balanced without fear. Since coming home to Vancouver I have lost that balance but know that in a pinch I can fall back on a passion of mine that is relatively unknown to most, the joy I find in writing. I too wish for my life to be an open book. While I find myself ashamed at times for things that I have done in the past, or, scared because my opinion is not the popular one, I find such freedom is sharing EXACTLY what I think and feel. Just as you have found relief in your journals of the past and more recently your blog, I too have gone as far to start my own blog. But...it remains blank. I battle with what my intentions might be in creating such an outlet. I've been honest enough to know that I completely desire feedback. Not because I want the attention or for people to agree with me, but because I wish to provoke thought and gather other's insight no matter if it's similar or dissimilar. But because I'm clearly doing it for a reaction of sorts, I wonder...does this make me selfish in some fashion? With that, there lies one reason why I haven't started my blog yet.
ReplyDeleteAnother curiosity is how much information is TOO much? Do I go as far as naming names or do I blur the lines and respect privacy? If I don't say exactly what's on my mind, is that fair to ME? Have you ever written something great but withheld just a little personal information, only to find that you now hate what you have scribed? "Ah, but if I just add this one little thing it would make so much more sense!" Yes, but what will the reaction be? Will it cause hurt feelings, or, will people be put off because you are TOO revealing? I also find that the more I try to protect others or myself in my writing, the less it makes sense. I figure that if people know me then they can 'read between the lines' and understand EXACTLY what I'm trying to say. But, if that's the case then why not just come out and say everything? This ends up being a tough cycle, and yes, another reason why I just don't post my thoughts exactly how they are running through my head. Not "rocking the boat" may be good, because it's safe...but it's not exactly satisfying either for people like us.
I guess the bottom line may be this, if you can write it down and post it, then it's probably something that can easily be spoken about face to face. If you're really concerned, talk to the people involved first. Just say that you've been thinking about something that involves them and you'd like to blog about it. If people have qualms let them bring it up, otherwise it should be considered fair game. Who knows, it might even give you more to write about too ; )
-Mike
Thanks Mike!!! I've decided to cut out names or use fake ones since I don't want to have to ask permission every time! If it involves Nic (which most of my life involves him) I will have him read it first to make sure I'm in the clear. As for the rest, it's my life and stories about ME so I will be open and honest and raw and if it's too much information and people don't like it...then they can stop reading! It isn't for them, it's a blog for me to write to express my thoughts. Most of the people who read my blog are family and friends. They know me and my thoughts. They get me and like to keep up with my life. People like to read blogs because they can relate. That's why I want to be open and honest. I don't want to paint myself as this perfect person. I have my flaws too and I want people to know ALL of me! I think they'd appreciate that more than me pretending to have the perfect job, home, life balance, etc.
ReplyDeleteYou have all the ingredients for a wonderful blog there Mr. Moore so get to writing all ready! You know I'll read!